...random thoughts, opinions and secrets on children... aging... cooking... crafts... nature...divorce...second chances...
and whatever else I deem curious...
~Copyright 2017. Hootie~

Sunday, January 04, 2015

A New Year = A Knew Me...a.k.a. The Me I Used to Know

My New Year's resolution... graduate school is completed so, write more on my blog.

Although on the surface it appears that my blog has been rather inactive, truly I found three very powerful, very telling drafts written during the past year.  Feelings needed to be written down, but not shared with others.  I am working on absorbing the lessons I have learned in my personal life over the past two years and letting the wisdom shine through.

Here is one snippet that I will share:

 (written in July 2014)
In June of 2013, I started on a path to remember who I was.  I was seeking me.  For years I have put my wants, needs and desires on a back burner.  I really truly didn't know who I was any more.  I have always felt that my place in this world was to make everyone else happy.  I have discovered there is a strong women in my skin.  She is cute, she is happy, she is smart (very smart), handy, clever, brave, creative, resourceful, confident, compassionate, and loving.  She loves nature and animals.  She enjoys cooking and sharing her talents in the kitchen with others.  She enjoys laughing, romantic comedies, classical music and upbeat popular music.  But she is still lonely.
I can officially add MS
after my name now.

Last night I started to write again...this was what I said, and later I re-read what I wrote above!

Growing up I loved life. 
I remember singing into my hairbrush to all the current tunes on the radio.  Laughing to silly jokes.  Hanging out with friends.  Loving on my pets.  Playing card games with my family.

I am starting to see a theme.  I believe the confident me may be resurfacing.

I am on my way to being single (again.  Breathe.  You can do this.  Being single does not have to mean being lonely).  It means I get to choose what I do, when I do it and with whom I share my time.  It means I get to surround myself with others who enjoy life, like I do.  It means I get to love and have love returned.  It means I get to let go of negative sources in my life and focus on bringing joy and not having to explain, feel guilty for or justify my happiness.

Let the new year begin!

1 comment:

Steph said...

Congrats on your MS and I'm thinking of you!