Well, now we are playing the waiting game. After today mom will have only 10 more treatments. Then the moment of truth...CT scan.
Life feels like it's at a standstill right now. Things are going on around me, but I don't want to acknowledge them too much. Last night I was on my front porch watching the hummingbirds come to my feeder...if I were in my mom's shoes maybe this would be the last year I could watch hummers. I watched the bumblebees buzzing in and out of my spirea...could be the last time I note them. A lightning bug came up from the bushes as the sun was setting....it's all very sad and I am not ready to be sad again yet.
Last Sunday my sister was visiting mom. She told me she got into a fight with Art on Saturday night. He's limiting mom's nausea pills because they are expensive. She's suppose to take a pill every six hours as needed...he's only giving her 1/2 of a pill. I guess they cost $30.00 a piece.
I'm mad at Art right now because at the end of May when I was visiting he commented that he's so tired of sleeping with someone who keeps waking up and getting sick. I discovered about a month before that Mom and Art have seperate rooms at home. Since she's been taking Chemo he's been sleeping with her at Grams house. What a jerk. I wish I could think of a roundabout way to remind him of his wedding vows.
When I last visited mom, I took my kids up. Art was happy I was there. He said I could sleep with mom, he needed a break. I wish I felt more compassion for him and could understand his thoughts a bit more. I don't. I keep my thoughts to myself. It's probably better that way.
Time to call mom and rejoice that there are only 1o more treatments after today for her.