...random thoughts, opinions and secrets on children... aging... cooking... crafts... nature...divorce...second chances...
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~Copyright 2017. Hootie~

Monday, November 03, 2008

What was her name again?

It was Angie Riggins. She was the administrative assistant to the director of HR at a big corporation I used to work for BC.

Before Children.

We were good friends. I was a Mortgage Loan Examiner and she and I hit it off right away. We had lunch together everyday for over two years. We were part of the same group of gal-pals in the office. I remember back to when I found out I was pregnant with my first child. I was elated and I couldn't wait to go into work and tell my friends there. Angie's response was quite shocking to me. With the news that I was pregnant was also the news that I was going to try and find a way to stay home with my child after he was born. I would have eight months to figure out how I was going to work this out. Oh, my friend was supportive of my pregnancy. She even helped host a baby shower for me at work. It was her response to my wanting to stay at home with my child that was shocking. "Well, we won't be able to be friends anymore once you leave." That's what she said. Verbatim.

We won't be able to be friends? I didn't understand. What would having a baby and staying home with them have to do with our friendship? Angie all ready had two children of her own. She knew what it was like to be a mom. Why would we have to stop being friends? In the end her prophesy rang true. We did stop being friends. It wasn't a mean spirited ending. We just drifted apart. I did take my new baby up to see her and all my other friends, but as the days away from that working environment turned into weeks away, I found I wanted less and less to go back. Each time I did go back into my former work zone, I felt the pangs of jealousy my co-workers were silently, and some not so silently, sending via telepathy my way. I did eventually stop visiting.

Several months ago I moved three miles away, into a new house and neighborhood. Although no one has said, "when you move we won't be friends anymore," it is obvious by the actions displayed by those around me that something has changed.

Making that choice long ago to stay at home with both my children was one of the best decisions I have ever made. Based on past history, I feel like it's time for me to adjust once again. Maybe that's the hint life is giving me now...time for new challenges! Ebb and flow.

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